slym2none
TCBF Member
Joined: December 2016
Posts: 3,540
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Post by slym2none on Jun 24, 2017 16:19:23 GMT -8
A Hispanic magician tells his audience that for his next trick, he will vanish before the count of three. He says "Uno! Dos!..." and {*POOF*}
He disappears without a tres! |
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Post by Bats on Jun 25, 2017 2:57:31 GMT -8
What does a clock do when it's still hungry? {Zinger}
It goes back four seconds!   Encore! |
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Post by Bats on Jun 25, 2017 2:59:27 GMT -8
A horse walks into a bar. The Barman says... {Spoiler}
"Got any ID, Dobbin?" Pants. Absolutely  |
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Post by Bats on Jun 25, 2017 3:00:47 GMT -8
How do you kill a circus? {Spoiler}
Go for the juggler. |
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Post by Siggy's Tar Dust® on Jun 27, 2017 15:07:06 GMT -8
How do you frustrate a [place any insult you don't find personally offensive here]? |
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Post by Siggy's Tar Dust® on Jun 27, 2017 15:08:26 GMT -8
Why did the chicken cross the road? {Spoiler}To show the opossum it can be done. |
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Post by Bats on Jul 2, 2017 13:14:24 GMT -8
How many Caped Crusaders does it take to change a light-bulb? {Spoiler}
None. They like the dark. |
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Post by Jeffro on Jul 3, 2017 3:51:21 GMT -8
Why doesn't Kurt Cobain ever drive? {Spoiler}
Cause he'd rather just ride shotgun.
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Post by Bats on Dec 9, 2018 10:36:12 GMT -8
In space news, NASA have discovered an ancient Martian civilisation which appears to have drank mercury... {Punchline}They stored it in Hg wells. |
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Post by Bats on Dec 9, 2018 11:14:27 GMT -8
An English cat named One Two Three challenged a French cat called Un Deux Trois to a swimming race across the Channel...
{Punchline}
Un Deux Trois cat sank. |
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Post by Bats on Dec 9, 2018 11:16:07 GMT -8
Today, a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool...
{Punchline}
I gave him a glass of water. |
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Post by Bats on Dec 9, 2018 11:18:20 GMT -8
Why don’t owls mate in the rain?
{Punchline} Because it’s too wet to woo  |
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Post by Bats on Dec 9, 2018 11:20:51 GMT -8
Why did the lion and the witch enter the wardrobe? {Punchline}
Narnia business! |
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Post by Bats on Dec 9, 2018 11:27:36 GMT -8
How does Good King Wenceslas like his pizza? {Punchline}
Deep pan, crisp and even. |
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Post by Bats on Dec 9, 2018 11:31:03 GMT -8
I’ve just seen Chris Rea on the train. Christmas is ruined  |
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