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Post by Bats on Jul 8, 2018 9:16:05 GMT -8
Nice going, Fiddy! Awesome work  |
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Post by Bats on Jul 8, 2018 10:03:47 GMT -8
My fav part...
"Meanwhile in Batavia, Oscar the Grouch climbed out of platinum trash can, and into Cher." |
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Post by Siggy's Tar Dust® on Jul 8, 2018 10:18:14 GMT -8
 yeah, the can must have been too clean. |
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Post by FiveZero on Jul 8, 2018 14:00:18 GMT -8
I broke up the pages into smaller sections. Page 47-56 but overall satisfied. Hickory dickory dock Myrtle wound the chicken's neck until the local veterinarian told her to shout, "Chicken ckoking...""is best when"stone cold sober "... by Stone Cold...""...Steve Austin." Powers to shag seven llamas and one titmouse isn't something to brag about. Smiling ear to nose, Warp Face Jobs by Grandpa...are the best. Grandma cackled with lust and hunger and gobbled down a foot long liverwurst and onions with yellow mustard donut, with V8 engines ticking over. Perplexingly, Bert handed Ernie a broken VCR, in which the Heisenberg Couplers compensated for nothing! Ernie was sad. Bert was elated! Kermit slapped Grover! The Batavian ambassador also slapped Grover,who became enraged and slapped himself with a fish. The chips, however, absorbed his ear wax, which ran like bacon grease down his uniform. The smell attracted Big Bird's friend Mr. Snuffleupagus to inspect Grover's uniform, "THE INSEAM'S FINE!" "(But don't stop...)" You'll find my nose looks just like a big object of indeterminate molecules. Look closely at the throbbing pores. Notice how they almost wink as each squeezes the pus out and draws the boogers down into the nether regions. My back hurts , almost as much as my front. I gotta stop eating that spicy teriyaki fried kittens. Those little pussies are so sweet and cuddly, I just stick my tongue out and groom the fur of their tiny toons vhs collections. Outraged by the turn of events , the alien spacecraft 'sploded the world. It got better. The healed world yielded much Indica for Paraquat testing. The kumquats were, with envious eyes, devoured greedily by depressed monitor lizards who gobbled up the goodies. Doormen like to see reciprocity within the established rules set of coal mining. Coalface workers unite! We'll trade our dignity for some bling. Platinum grills, dolla bills, and big ass chains. Dignity runs cheap within the bowels of hobo jungles with dirty towels. So don't keep your farts in. Glenn Ford's ghost just asked me which way to the 'Superman' set and the Alamo. "Ozzy Was Here", exclaimed the small footed tour guide as he farted. Mortified by his personal moral negligence Bert punched him in the knackers. Bert laughed at the funny dance of twelve stunted Crimson-hating  . Steely Dan love everything in the rainbow unicorn parade prevention task force. Drinking white lightning, Ernie pulled his Rotator cuff lifting boxes of electric egg beaters and elongated women pleasers. Miss Piggy smirked, hiding her receipt from jealous Kermit. "Ha!" she thought "I'll go visit that jerk Scooter and his orange grove in Florida." Off she went. She never arrived. Lost in Singapore, flirty lady boys shoot pingpong balls into the corner at Humberto Ramos. |
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Post by FiveZero on Jul 8, 2018 14:02:58 GMT -8
Page 57 - 66 and part of 67
His legs looked like Stu smashed a rotting piñata full of bees with a juggernaut.
Taking several photographs, Kermit railed Piggy and Peter David. Al Milgrom begged forgiveness and asked for his artwork to be spared from the eraser and toluene bath. The toxic chemicals improved the art but only marginally, so he resubmitted his drawing fingers with some improvement ultimately, the results failed miserably.
On to the next story about Miss Piggy... Pork scratchings are quite tasty according to Kermit. He liked to lick them until they made him tingly all over and sweat profusely.
Statler and Waldorf watched intently, with Piggy and Kermit gettin' jiggy with a pogo stick. Pogo seethed at the damage his stick caused. He never had that large of an orifice filled with rusty ball bearings covered in treacle.
I Googled "treacle", and it's French for big ass odored rectal warts.
Suddenly, on the topic, Bert recalled the day he flew home to consult his dictionary about homemade remedies. Realizing dictionaries won't cure anything, Bert relied upon WebMD to satisfy his morbid curiosity.
He looked up pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis, spelling it correctly he speculated that the curvature of local wheezing bovine intestines could be due to chipolata frozen yogurt shakes. Shaken, Bert collapsed and wept profusely. Rethinking his life he married Maria Von Knackerthrasher.
The Honeymoon Suite collapsed under the pressure of 54 fat onlookers eating popcorn and bacon fat. Their massive girth and rhythmic whacking caused massive tectonic shifting beneath the steel reinforced foundation of their bunker.
Deep beneath the layers of fat and tattered pinafore, microscopic evil scientists pontificate particularly perplexing variables disallowing metaphysical considerations while still looking devilishly handsome in a tuxedo.
This doesn't excuse vexing behaviours toward particle board furniture.
At the tri-state corn husk eating derby, 12 tomatoes merged with Fabio to form Voltron Greenberg, Pet Attorney. His first client , a large purple gumdrop named Grimace.
Grimace had no place in society, including the church. So he decided to sue McDonald's and Wendy's. However, Dave Thomas resurrected Grimace's hope for world domination.
Poodles, tramps and thieves are the core to any steady system of demon summoning.
Condoms also are a necessity in dealing with fungus on his tongue.
Renowned Physicians tried to scrape together the knowledge to build a thingy to sterilize Grimace's tongue fungus.
Somehow instead, they created a wormhole to Asgard. Tours were set up in advance, almost as quickly as a grizzly bear tearing into a fluffy bunny rabbit. Heimdall's sister Sif uses Frost Giants to dispense ice for the penguin.
Her vivid dreams depict the ongoing struggles between tadpoles, tramps and thieves, whenever she eats moldy cheese. Funnily, tadpoles support crime,sex slaves, drugs, illegal beta fights and hot dog breeding.
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Post by FiveZero on Jul 8, 2018 14:03:54 GMT -8
Pages 67-76
Tramps, however, are welcomed to stuff it, since they smell. Thieves are dirt bags and also smell.
Tadpole Nobility demands fealty from all they survey, including King Yertle and his Queen, Myrtle. Both quite fertile, Yertle and Myrtle removed her girdle to reveal turtles trying to hurdle someone named Pirtle hoping the hurt'll vanish when Myrtle lands.
But when the story ends they become friends whose behavior tends to need amends for the trends of European politics.
Don't be dicks to small kids.
"It's open season..." yelled Daffy Duck. "That wascally wabbit thinks I'm Elmer but I'm actually Oliver Nosepicks, Paranormal Investigations Medical Professor MD PhD FOS and I'm mad as a hatstand.
Nobody cared, apparently, because they're dead. Very convenient for a rotting zombie with the munchies for toe cheese and taint gristle.
Suddenly, Bert reappeared! "Who cut the cheese?!" he cried. "I cannot tell who guffed. I sniff and sniff and it stinks like tonsil stones pickled in fungus! Wet farts suck.
These 'varts' cause shaky leg walking, with a determined bathroom-bound purposefulness.
Suddenly, on the topic of France, Bert said that French made toilets tended to be rarely used because they're just a hole in the back alley. Odors permeated the steamy pit. Many tourists would offer their orifices for a physical examination to the god of fame, Pat Paulson. He would attempt inventing mechanical eyelids placed over the nictitating membranes of the vestigial remnants of Jimmy Hoffa.
Jimmy's corpse smelled like Miss Piggy's long, flexible porcine hair, washed with Kermit fluids and amphibian roadkill. Flies happily sang a song; "Fertile Ground".
The buzz was so intense it almost sounded electric and turned the onlookers on like a pack of wolverines in heat on payday. Contraceptives get hung on embiggened proboscis. Alternatively, they're marinated in Pig and frog urine, soy sauce, apple cider and stout beer. "Hey, that's considered gourmet fare in Batavia. Shine on, you big noses!" laughed Pinocchio and Minnie "Turtle-Face" Driver.
A rumbling deep within their tummies unleashed a tidal bloom the size of Michelle's entourage of gigantic piggy lovely lady bumps. Gypsies, Trumps and overjoyed with the Enema Tax increase. It was YUGE! It, alone, funds the construction of monolithic skyscrapers, built Ford tough, except for the mauve space age dwellings. Mauve being the snowflake's favorite color.
Meanwhile, in Compton Falls, Buffalo, Bert commanded Ernie to sing a lullaby for their baby sewer rat, Alfredo. Once asleep, sacrificial wombats proceeded to eviscerate little Alfredo. Bert was horrified!
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Post by FiveZero on Jul 8, 2018 14:04:33 GMT -8
Pages 77-86
Ernie told Bert , call Dr. Bombay.
"I said Doctor!" "Mr. MD" ♫ "...Now can you..." ♫ ♪"... tell me (x3)..."♫ ♫ "...what's ailin' me." ♫
"Stop singing!", said the whole world.
*Raspberry* said Yoko. "Oh no, I don' know why she swallowed a thug life rhinoceri and a fly.
Okay, fine. Perhaps she'll die. I was made beneficiary of her premium Flamingo Dancing Membership, "where am i?" a voice called from the bowels of a giant gnat named Nat. Pulse rates flutter as news cameras exploded with great explosions causing extreme explosive ruptures throughout all of Explosivia, Blowupistan.
Baron Bomb Blastka Boom gently banged his babooshka, Into the bosom behind Betty's bare necessities. Who knew this would lead to much gnashing of the gums but no food squeezed from empty toothpaste tubes and Bert's pyjamas.
Oddly, corn fell from Mr. Spock's ears. Corn Stocks plummeted like fried silks induces vomiting; Quickly. Spock decided to go to Walgreens where he bought Murine and candy. QuintoSpock and NimoySpock... Mind-Melded with Big Bird and Larry Bird.
Chaos Theory states that this union will destroy the universe.
Fortunately Perry White and Jonah Jameson have awesome photographers but no cameras can focus on the pimple on Karen Page's heart shaped lady parts.
Dark clouds loom thunder rumbles ominously and backsides depressurize, smelling of cheese. This was not regular smelling cheese, the aroma that pus puts out goes well with Rosie O'Donnell's armpits, Michael Moore's stinky greasy facial pores and red wine.
Popular opinions suggest that popular opinions are fake news.
The real news is being hidden deep within a vacuum surrounded by trusted popular opinions.
Meat pies with Fake and real beef should not drink and drive whilst sucking eggs. Sucking chest wounds are not nice. They suck. Coincidentally other sucking wounds blow. Ironic, huh?
Medics were baffled About the wounds "Call Dr. Love!" ejaculated Bert, wondering who rubbed his sore, open wound.
"He's got the crazy eyes, mate." Scratching his chin, then his balls, Father Murphy boogied down to the ground, his jive was live like a hornets hive. All that scratching and boogieing unleashed all manner of allergies and phobia to Marvel Comics.
Understandable, considering the dreck that DC has been excreting. "It's our fate to suck forever..." Thus, pre Eighties babies know that pre Eighties comics are better than anything The Variant Crazed Ego Maniacs currently have and push, leaving good books behind for savvy collectors. The magic has been lost with these elves, ever since the 'House Of Arwen and Aragorn was foreclosed last Autumn and the Hobbiton refused them.
Meanwhile, jungle fever finally overtook Rivendell and the orcs bred new atrocities that caused havok with the Ents and Uncles. Wiping
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Post by FiveZero on Jul 8, 2018 14:06:38 GMT -8
Okay, that was a lot of copy and paste. My eyes are burning so time for a break. I should be able to complete the entire story by next weekend. There was some funny stuff in there. Enjoy the read.
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Post by Bats on Jul 8, 2018 14:12:26 GMT -8
Okay, that was a lot of copy and paste. My eyes are burning so time for a break. I should be able to complete the entire story by next weekend. There was some funny stuff in there. Enjoy the read. Nice work, Fiddy 
*Raspberry* said Yoko. "Oh no, I don' know why she swallowed a thug life rhinoceri and a fly."
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yeah, the can must have been too clean.
. 
